Last Call: The Drunken Adventures of Ah Beng Bartender

A Text-Based Drinking Game - Complete Edition

<h1>🍺 LAST CALL 🍺</h1> <h2>The Drunken Adventures of Ah Beng Bartender</h2> You are Ah Beng, 28 years old, just lost your job at the cardboard box factory because you fell asleep in the box again. Now you work at The Tipsy Tiger - the dodgiest bar in Geylang. Your job: keep drunk customers happy and don't set anything on fire. Current Status: 🍺 Drunkenness: 0% (Sober as a judge) 💰 Tips: $0 📖 Recipes Known: 1 (Tiger Beer - open can, pour) First customer walks in... [[Look up to see who it is|Customer 1]]

<h2>🧑‍💼 The Salaryman Who Got Rejected</h2> A man in crumpled white shirt and tie stumbles to the bar. His eyes are red. He smells like desperation and Axe body spray. Salaryman: "Bro... I proposed to my girlfriend at the HDB void deck just now... she said no because my CPF not enough..." He slams the counter. Salaryman: "Give me something STRONG. Make me forget my ex and my BTO application." What you serve? [[Tiger Beer - Cheap and cheerful|Wrong Drink 1]] [[Whisky Neat - Liquid courage|Wrong Drink 1]] [[Singapore Sling - Sweet oblivion|Correct Drink 1]] [[Water - Bro you need to hydrate|Bad Choice 1]]

You slide the drink over. Salaryman: "Not strong enough lah! My heartbreak need at least 40% alcohol!" He chugs it anyway. Then orders another. 🍺 Your drunkenness: +5% (You took a sip to test) [[Try again|Customer 1]]

Salaryman: "WATER?! You think I'm at spa ah?! My girlfriend left me, not my kidney!" He starts crying. Loudly. The whole bar is staring. Embarrassment level: Maximum [[Quick! Give him real drink|Customer 1]]

You mix gin, cherry brandy, and mysterious red syrup that might be cough medicine. Salaryman: "Wah... this one nice... taste like childhood... but make me forget adulthood..." He drinks. His eyes go misty. Salaryman: "You know ah... I think I better focus on my crypto investment first... BTO can wait..." He tips you $5 and falls asleep on the bar. ✅ Recipe Unlocked: Singapore Sling 💰 Tip: $5 🍺 Your drunkenness: +10% [[Next customer walks in|Customer 2]]

<h2>👩‍🦱 The Auntie Who Thinks She's 25</h2> An auntie in leopard print and too much lipstick sits down. She smells like designer imposter perfume and regret. Auntie: "Aiyo! Bartender! You handsome ah! Like my son, but less disappointing!" Auntie: "Tonight I celebrating! My husband think I at zumba class! Actually I at bar! Heng ah!" What she want? [[Wine - Classy auntie|Wrong Drink 2]] [[Teh Tarik - But this is a bar...|Wrong Drink 2]] [[Sake Bomb - Youthful choice!|Correct Drink 2]] [[Whisky - Match her energy|Correct Drink 2]]

Auntie: "Eeeee! So boring one! I come here to feel young, not to feel like I'm at my daughter's wedding!" She takes selfie for Instagram. [[Try again|Customer 2]]

Auntie: "WAH LAU! THIS ONE POWER! Make me feel like I'm in Zouk 1995 again!" She starts dancing to no music. Auntie: "You know ah, last time I clubbing queen!" ✅ Recipe Unlocked: Sake Bomb 💰 Tip: $10 🍺 Your drunkenness: +15% [[Last call of the night|Customer 3]]

<h2>🤖 The Crypto Bro</h2> A guy in hoodie and glasses (indoor, at night) rushes in. He's sweating and typing on phone. Crypto Bro: "Bro! Bro! Emergency! I just lost 50k on Luna 2.0! Need to drink until I forget private keys!" What to serve this broke millionaire? [[Champagne - Celebration of losses|Wrong Drink 3]] [[Cheap Beer - Match his wallet now|Wrong Drink 3]] [[Long Island Iced Tea - Forget everything|Correct Drink 3]] [[Mocktail - Maybe he should stop|Bad Choice 3]]

Crypto Bro: "Bro... I just lost my life savings... I don't need taste, I need AMNESIA." [[Give him the strong stuff|Correct Drink 3]]

Crypto Bro: "MOCKTAIL?! You want me stay sober and feel my pain?! You monster!" He starts explaining NFTs to you. For 20 minutes. [[Cut him off, give him alcohol|Correct Drink 3]]

You mix vodka, rum, gin, tequila, and triple sec. Basically everything behind the bar. Crypto Bro: "Wah... this one make me forget my seed phrase... good..." ✅ Recipe Unlocked: Long Island Iced Tea 💰 Tip: $2 (He broke already) 🍺 Your drunkenness: +25% [[Your shift ends...|Shift End]]

<h1>🌙 SHIFT COMPLETE 🌙</h1> You stumble out of The Tipsy Tiger at 3am. Final Stats: 🍺 Drunkenness: 50% 💰 Total Tips: $17 📖 Recipes Learned: 4 What you want do now? [[Go home and sleep|Sleep End]] [[Go to 7-11 buy more beer|Bad End]] [[Travel to Tokyo|Tokyo Start]]

<h2>🏠 The Morning After</h2> You wake up in your HDB flat. Head pounding. Mouth taste like regret. Phone got 47 WhatsApp messages. All from your boss. THE END Want to play Chapter 2: Tokyo? [[Go to Tokyo|Tokyo Start]] [[Start Over|Start]]

<h2>🍺 The Never-Ending Night</h2> You buy 4 cans of Carlsberg at 7-11. Drink at void deck. Fall asleep on bench. GAME OVER [[Try Again|Start]]

<h1>🗾 TOKYO IZAKAYA 🗾</h1> You used your $17 tips to buy a Scoot ticket to Tokyo. Now working at Yamamoto's Yakitori in Shibuya. New Drinks: Sake, Highball, Shochu [[Ganbatte!|Tokyo Customer 1]]

<h2>👔 The Japanese Salaryman</h2> A man in black suit, tie loosened, sits down. He hasn't slept in 3 days. Salaryman: "Ehhh... Singapore bartender?" He orders in Japanese. You don't understand. What you do? [[Guess: Serve sake|Wrong Tokyo 1]] [[Use Google Translate|Correct Tokyo 1]] [[Serve Highball|Correct Tokyo 1]]

Salaryman: "Ehhhh... not this one..." He looks sad. [[Try again|Tokyo Customer 1]]

Salaryman: "Hai! This one! My favorite!" ✅ Recipe: Highball 💰 Tip: ¥1000 ($10) [[Next|Tokyo Customer 2]]

<h2>🎤 The Failed Idol Singer</h2> A girl in school uniform (25 years old) walks in. She looks like she just got rejected from AKB48 audition. Idol Girl: "I practice singing... 8 hours every day... but my dad say... 'Get real job'..." What you do? [[Tell her your Singapore story|Encourage Idol]] [[Make her Singapore Sling|Singapore Sling Idol]]

You: "Dream is dream. Small or big. If you want sing, you sing!" ✅ Item: Idol Demo CD 💰 Tip: ¥2000 ($20) [[Next|Tokyo Customer 3]]

You make pink Singapore Sling. Idol Girl: "Waaa! Pink! Kawaii!" 💰 Tip: ¥1500 ($15) [[Next|Tokyo Customer 3]]

<h2>🥷 The "Ninja" Tourist</h2> A man in all black enters. "I seek... good hawker center in Singapore!" He's not a ninja. Just watched too much anime. What you recommend? [[Tiong Bahru - Hipster|Hipster Tourist]] [[Maxwell - Tian Tian chicken rice|Correct Tourist]] [[Newton Circus (Tourist trap)|Evil Tourist]]

💰 Tip: ¥1000 ($10) [[End Tokyo|Tokyo End]]

You: "Maxwell! Tian Tian chicken rice! Anthony Bourdain eat before!" ✅ Contact: Shady Businessman 💰 Tip: ¥3000 ($30) [[End Tokyo|Tokyo End]]

You: "Newton Circus! Best hawker center!" You just sent him to tourist trap. He will pay $8 for chicken rice. 💰 Tip: ¥5000 ($50) 😈 Karma: -100 [[End Tokyo|Tokyo End]]

<h1>🌸 KONBOWA FROM TOKYO 🌸</h1> Tokyo Stats: 💰 Total Tips: ¥10500 (~$105 SGD) 🍺 Drunkenness: 25% Boss from Singapore calls: "Come back! Or go Scotland!" [[Go back Singapore|The Return]] [[Continue to Scotland|Scotland Start]]

<h2>🏠 Welcome Home, Ah Beng</h2> You return to The Tipsy Tiger. You are now: <h2>🌟 CERTIFIED INTERNATIONAL BARTENDER 🌟</h2> THE END... for now. [[Go to Scotland|Scotland Start]] [[Start Over|Start]]

<h1>🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿 WELCOME TO SCOTLAND 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿</h1> You used your Tokyo earnings to fly to Edinburgh. Now working at McTavish's Whisky Den. Everything is brown. [[Aye aye!|Scotland Customer 1]]

<h2>🧔 The Man Who Hasn't Left Since 1987</h2> An old man with white beard. Smells like whisky and history. Old Man: "Ach! Fursty?" Ah! Thirsty! Old Man: "Gie's a wee dram o' the Glenfiddich!" [[Give Glenfiddich 12|Correct Whisky]]

Old Man: "Aye... that's the stuff..." Old Man: "I've been coming here... 40 years... This stool shaped like my bahookie now..." 💰 Tip: £10 ($16 SGD) 🥃 Recipe: Glenfiddich 12 [[Next|Scotland Customer 2]]

<h2>👰 The Runaway Bride</h2> A woman in wedding dress bursts in. "TEQUILA! NOW! LOTS!" Bride: "I LEFT HIM AT THE ALTAR! HE WANTED TO MOVE TO MOTHER-IN-LAW'S HOUSE!" [[Tequila shots|Tequila Bride]] [[Champagne - Anti-wedding|Champagne Bride]]

Bride: "WOOOO! I AM FREE!" 💰 Tip: £20 ($32 SGD) [[Next|Scotland Customer 3]]

Bride: "I like that! ANTI-WEDDING!" 💰 Tip: £25 ($40 SGD) [[Next|Scotland Customer 3]]

<h2>🧙 The Wizard</h2> A man in robe enters. "I seek... the Water of Life!" (Uisce beatha = whisky in Gaelic) [[Give expensive Macallan 25|Expensive Wizard]] [[Ask to see wand|Funny Wizard]]

Wizard: "Powerful magic... I can feel... the dragon..." 💰 Tip: £100 ($160 SGD) [[End Scotland|Scotland End]]

You: "Show me wand first." Wizard: "Elderwood from Forbidden Forest!" You: "That's a branch from tree outside." Wizard: "...10 points to Singapore for observation..." 💰 Tip: £20 ($32 SGD) [[End Scotland|Scotland End]]

<h1>🏰 SLÀINTE MATH! 🏰</h1> Scotland Stats: 💰 Total Tips: £177 (~$285 SGD) 🥃 New Recipes: Glenfiddich, Laphroaig 🧙 Wizards Met: 1 Where next? [[Go home|The Final Return]] [[Start Over|Start]]

<h1>🏆 THE LEGEND RETURNS 🏆</h1> You return to The Tipsy Tiger. You are now: <h2>🌟 AH BENG: INTERNATIONAL BARTENDER OF MYSTERY 🌟</h2> ✈️ Countries: 3 (Singapore, Japan, Scotland) 💰 Total Earnings: $408 SGD 🍺 Drinks Mastered: 10+ 🎭 Strange Customers: 9 Promoted to Head Bartender! THE END Sequel: "Last Call 2: Ah Beng Goes to Space Bar" 🚀 [[Play Again|Start]]